Laying in solitude - drifting through dreams.

It's time for bed.

Sleep is the first thought I would guess someone would think when headed off to bed......... I don't think that thought has been number one on my list for a long time now. Even as a child. A television is a dangerous thing to a person who doesn't know how to use it properly.

Going to bed for me is turning on a dvd and completely losing myself. Even if I stumble home from some sort of social shin-dig of sorts - I'll toss in something.

Most often it will depict my mood. It will keep me in what ever bliss I am feeling at the moment and all together keep my thoughts on something I probably wouldn't want to feel otherwise. Or perhaps not. I recall watching many movies to get out of a certain mood.

When a young child watches television I'm more than sure they watch some sort of cartoon. I'm beginning to become a strong believer in this whole "brainwashes the mind" myth strict religious activists used to pull out when their child did something questionable at school. I don't however think it turns the mind into some sort of evil. Television is no more responsible for creating evil then a gun is to killing. Sure - they may possess aspects that lead towards that final - but it is within the beholder that really makes the decision. Day to day you make decisions. What to eat? Is your spoon responsible for making you unhealthy? Healthy? Break your diet for just that single bite of Strawberry Cheesecake?

I wouldn't be down for someone telling me what to watch. I am a free going guy. This isn't a cocky remark to begin off my dating video..... (for that I'd begin to tell them how nice I am ;) ).... In a restaurant I will order something at random. In fact it's been a thing where I will walk into a restaurant of any sort and order the Soup of the Day. But as the waiterperson begins to open their mouth to inevitably tell me their daily soup(s) - I stop them...... I want the surprise. It's a simple joy. Nothing more. I'm not hoping to one day try every soup. I don't make bets with people to see if it will be the typical Chicken Noodle (which I love still as an adult). I do it for me. I do it for the mood I am in - and for that small adventure.

Getting into my teens I begun to watch late night television with the all too well known hosts of Connan O'Brian - Letterman - and Jay Lenno...... Not Crieg Furgison. Not for any reason. He makes me twitter with laughter. He's a gas to watch on the tube. But he unfortunately airs with Connan's time slot. Sooooo I chose the ginger host.

This got me into "movies". It made me knowledgeable of stars - films - and cheap comedy. Things to which I guess people would think I would thrive on. But other than Films - the other two I do not...... I'm more of the Dry comedian..................... Unless of course I slipped in a pool.

................................or if it were raining... ahem any way...

I think someone turns out the way to which they make their choices. If you honestly think "Today - I'm going to appreciate the outdoors." - sure enough you are going to. This isn't a trick. Unless of course it is raining and you get hit by lightning..... Then that's just bad luck.... But have you ever danced in the rain? Soaked your soul with a release of what ever the heck you have buggin your insides? Do it. I know everyone loves to one day write the saying"Dance as if no one's watching". I say dance in the rain. And hope people watch - and they do it too. The release this world will endure will be something quite pure.

I am a film lover and appreciater because I have chosen to release my mind to them and just give in to story lines. Some people sit in their rooms and watch South Park for the comedy and the entertainment they feel for those passing minutes. Some don't watch - Some read. The choices you make - make you. I choose to just be. Whether thats not shaving for a month befor I salute my last day as a teenager - or if I honk my horn for the first time at a passing car and feel bad about it and wish I had rather just flipped him the finger. I just do what ever it is I need to do. I'll plan ahead for my future. I'll sit back and take things as they come. And I will watch a movie about love to give myself that hour and fortyfive minutes of feeling what I had once or once thought I had felt. It's questionable when you don't feel the things you used to love feeling. Like moving away from home and missing that first fall of Autom. Or ................. (this is where you fill in the blank)

I think watching movies and not dummy t.v has made it's contribution to how I hold myself - release - relax & recycle..........ahem...... I think it's moments like these where I get into that quick mood and fall back into a song and just begin typing where I'm a viking..... :) hint of Ralph.

Wanna have a pJ moment?

-re read THIS blog while listening to Lisa Hannigan. http://www.myspace.com/lisahannigan Go to the very last song on her player. It's just simply called Sea Song Demo. It's a demo.. ha.. from her new album that just came out. I saw her live. Other than not hearing her because of her soft voice - This woman's got what I need tonight. Listen to the rest of the tunes. You don't even need to re read this blog again..... Just sit back.... And listen..... If you're in the mood.

-go dance in hopes people see you. Have them remember you. If they dance to - and even bump into you again - they'll remember the feeling of letting go - as you did.

I hear it's going to rain on Friday.........

-pJ