One foot in front of the Other

Its the calm befor the storm...

From a simple phone call I have been takin from a calm place.  Filled with blissful thoughts of movement and freedom through dance.... Then... Ring ring....

I haven't been able to move very well.
I'm a hell of a dancer haha not someone to brag about or mention in conversation - but I can blend in... BLEND in. Not hide.

A week ago I cut my foot on some glass and have been pretty slow moving - if that - since... It was an interesting day filled with pain, stress, and oddly enough walking. Life on the limp lane has been something to reflect upon...

-Mission 31- I will NOT walk 500 miles!

The rooster would have crowed its last crow this morning. Something about wakeing up this day was not something I wanted to do. Friday mornings are nobodys friends. But of course - you need friday morning before you get friday night. And we all know what happens then... So of course - we endure.
I endured. The constant polyphonic alarm clock ring of "Geek In The Pink" by Jason Mraz had played enough now. I was up.  It was time to spend my traditional morning routine of get dressed in 10 different outfits and distinguish that I look to fat in all of them so I'll put on my dirty old plaid shirt...... -:D- How I do this - study in a musical theater program - and am straight, is BEYOND me......  Literally - God man.....  Sometimes I'm curious......  Not BY-Curious - just curious about how I am the way I am................  I'm a walking question these days.....

I was on to my 5th or 6th outfit ;) - whose to know these days - but as I continued my 13 year old girl routine - I noticed a very cool looking "Guiness" glass fall to the ground and smash something fierce on the ground........ "FEW" - I would then think to myself - "It JUST missed my foot!  Man that would have put me on the side lines for a while!" ---- Little did I know that 2 shards of glass were now stuck to the ball of my foot just WAITING to make port within my blood veins.................. Shall I continue my story?....... :).... paying attention are we? (this next part is rated 18A)

"FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Okay - I'm awake now..... My foot is bloody - and I officially can not walk a step without screaming something a tad more french then the above content.....  I tried for a few moments to pry what little bits I could see from my flesh - but as a dear dear friend of mine would say in a West Indian accent .... "NoOoOoOoOo!"  (I heart Somo)

For those playing the homegame ----- I am in a Musical Theater Program at Sheridan Collage in Oakville, Ontario, Canada...........  For those of you who have never been in a program like this - I urge you to think of boot camp.......  Liza Minelli boot camp to be exact......  From the first initial "Fuck" battle cry cursing my piggies for the pain they were feeling - I was a mere 20 minutes away from a morning Tap Dance class................  I apologize if this is way over your head - but in order to Tap Dance.... You need full accessibility to the balls of your feet.  Yes I said balls - Take a moment now to chuckle and continue reading as I think spiteful things for you :) ............................ (That was a test to see if you would laugh....... Test is also like testic........ ahem...... :).... sorry)

SO -

Im screwed.......  What am I going to do? -- The only thing a professional would do....... I limped my ass to school in my dance wear and put on one of my tap shoes as my foot bled through the superhero band-aid and Toronto Maple Leaf Sock.......

My program is amazing..... It reeeeaallly is.  It is about craft - and progress.  The result should be clear at the end of the journey - so the teachers/professors/choreographers/vocal coaches/ artists of MANY-A variety - are scared for my well being....  And my teacher in tap (bless her heart) sent me straight out to the nearest Walk in Clinic.........

Walk in Clinic?.............. Really?

Ohhhh yes....  Living as a starving artist this past month has taught me many things.  Number 1.  Cheap Soup is GOOOOOOOOD.  Number 2.  If it's between Coffee or Laundry - I'm going to always have nice smelling cologne around......  And of course -- YOU WALK EVERYWHERE!!!!

But today -- I limp....  

I waited for an hour until they finally saw me... Looked at my foot .....  They decided to dig around for a bit......  My foot had become a bloody diamond mine and this woman obtained the strength of all bloody seven dwarves - WORST PAIN ---  But alas - following a few squirms and manly coughs to show some sign of being a guy - she established there was no glass in my foot................ That she could see..... god damnit........  

So off I walked what should have been a 4 minute walk but turned into a 10 minute limp to this "X-Ray" office of some sort in the basement of some odd pharmaceutical building.  And just as quickly as they had wrapped up my foot in the clinic - this random woman who failed to mention her name had stripped the bandages right off........  Don't get me wrong - she seemed nice.  But I do prefer to be on a first name basis before somebody strips me down.

A few moments and foot movements later we were done.....  She walked out quickly and I was unsatisfied at the fact she didn't notice my glorious ballet point (;D) and her STILL not leaving me with a name or even a goodbye.  So in the assumption that I was all finished I hobbled up to the store and bought more bandages to wrap my foot in.....  Then off to class for the afternoon - sitting out and watching....  Lucky for me I had "POP" class - so I busted out my queen (Tabitha) and rocked that Ukulele to a version of "I'm Yours" with a little Bob Marley thrown in to spruce up my day!

Then off to my city of Toronto for a weekend away - I even stopped off to get some cologne.....  Was really tired this past week/needed my coffee.

And alas..... A week has passed.....  Sitting out from most of my dance classes - I get the call....  

Now I was told that if I didn't hear from them then I would be in the clear... "Hello Mr.Patrick - We would like to see you in the office to discuss about your X-Ray results...  Preferably tonight if you can."

I was allowed to leave class early and hobble my way to the doctors office.  Lucky for me I was tired and not wanting to go - so this was the beginning of an amazing evening..... sigh......  I took my seat in the waiting room and fell right a sleep.... I woke up to the giggles of pretty girls....  To my embarrassment I was making some of my sleeping noises..... Y'know...  just... don't ask... k?....  It's not gross.... but ..... Just don't....... sniff sniff...... ummmmmmmm...... cough.

"Patrick, you can come with us into the next room!"

I was quick to get up and answer in a manly voice to redeem some respect around the girls before dropping my hat and wobbling off as if I were some drunk off the street..... sigh....

It took a half an hour before the doctor finally got into the room and took a look at my foot.  He told me flat out that the X-rays came back saying I had glass in there still.  He gave me the option of just carrying on with my life and allowing the pain to heal although there would always be some sort of throbbing feeling I thought to myself......  SO I asked what was my option with this whole "Operation" he wanted to perform.

He told me I could simply book a time to come in and let him dig around to put it in a less than poetic fashion.....  Having a vision of my Voice and Tech in Acting class professor yelling at me to "get the damn thing fixed because you're a dancer god damnit!  That's your money maker!"

I told the doc to get me under the knife right then and there.

First thing out was a tiny little sparkle of glass.  We had a good laugh at the pain I could have felt over that....  Little did we know that the second bundle of joy to come into this world was a 2mm pointy piece of glass that had a nice red tint to it over the last week of my hot tub foot.  

We finished rather quick - cleaned me up - and I hobbled back home.... sigh....

Now the moral of my story is this.....................

Beyonce' had the BEST video this year!  Like C'mon people!

-pJ

(sighh, I hate Kanye)